How on earth can I put into words something as other worldly as India? It was somehow completely familiar to me, yet also utterly foreign. It was and is chaotic yet peaceful, noisy yet calm, frenetic but slow-paced, welcoming yet frustrating and above all, utterly magical and intangible. Why go to India?
I am always asked: “Which places should you visit on a first trip to India?” and of course, in this vast country, it is a sensible question. The first thing I would say is that it doesn’t really matter where you start your odyssey, just not to delay going for another moment. I waited until I was in my early 50s to set foot on Indian soil and although it is futile to have regrets, this is definitely one of them. If only I’d gone earlier, if only I’d discovered this incredible place sooner – I could have learned a new language, taught in a different educational system, seen the Taj Mahal long before I had crows’ feet and cynicism. But ‘what ifs’ are pointless…instead, I will visit as often as I can and see as much as I can and share these snippets of my experiences with you all.
So why did it take so long for me to visit somewhere I held so dear? The real reason seems silly now; I was worried about the poverty, but Mark Tully, the foreign correspondent in Delhi, has the best answer I have for this in the truism; “I don’t have to cope with the poverty; the poor have to cope with the poverty.” I was worried about beggars and getting ill. Yes, there are beggars, but they are often adorable groups of smiling children who want to practise their English. Talk to your tour guide – they will have the best advice on how to deal with beggars (this advice usually involves them telling you to ignore them!). There is literally no reason to worry about anything; you will be looked after like royalty. Booking with Chai Rose, your tour guide will meet you at the airport, introduce you to your driver in your private air conditioned car and look after you throughout the trip. We really will make India easy for you! Getting ill – it hasn’t ever happened to me in my numerous trips to India, but arm with yourself with some Imodium, be careful with eating some street food (again, your guide will help you), don’t drink water from the tap and try not to be paranoid about it all!
So, my love affair with India was cemented in February 2024. I bit the bullet and booked a Golden Triangle Tour with three friends, all from different periods of my life: my dearest school friend, my wonderful friend from university and a precious ‘mum’ friend, made when our sons were in nursery together. I was definitely the one of the group that spurred this trip on and persuaded (not that it took that much persuasion) to visit this land of cliches and contrasts, a place of mythical quality to me as my father had lived in India many decades ago and had a life-long affection for this country. I had grown up imagining India being like the black and white photographs in his precious album; exotic, hot, friendly, impoverished and benevolent, rich in colour, culture and heart.
India has now been proudly added to the list of the loves of my life, nestling amongst other loves such as my children, family, precious friends, travel, a few men along the way, my dog, my photo albums of memories, young children and education. Oh, and how could I possibly forget – chai! India snuck into my heart and has now claimed a chunk of it. Teenagers now talk about ‘foreshadowing’; well, if my second child had been a girl, she would have been called India-Rose, long before I had ever been there. No second girl ever arrived but my third child, Chai Rose Travels was born, fifteen years later!
But what should you expect when you get to India? Well, every cliche about India is true but it is also so much more that its cliches. You will arrive at one of the international airports (in my opinion, far nicer than London Heathrow or Gatwick and far less crowded!) and exit the terminal to, depending on the time of year, that blast of warm air that lets you know you are definitely not in the UK! Inquisitive faces will greet you (staring in very commonplace and not considered rude) especially if you are light skinned and have fair hair. Something no-one told me about India was to expect people to want to take your photo everywhere! They will boldly or shyly come up to you in most situations and say:”Selfie?” or “Can I click?” and I have never objected to this. Smile gracefully and say: “Of course!” as it makes them happy, as well as making this middle aged woman feel like some sort of celebrity! You may also find yourself on a Facetime to members of their extended family or friends, wanting to show them their new Western friends! People will ask where you are from and are touchingly and genuinely interested in the response.
You will have no doubt heard about Indian traffic and it really does need to be seen (and heard) to be believed! At first, something seems familiar – in India they drive on the left, a hangover from British rule, but almost everything else is decidedly un-British! The horns sound continuously, encouraged by beautiful calligraphy on the back of trucks and vans saying: ‘Blow Horn!’ and blow horn they certainly do! It isn’t necessarily a warning sound but more of a “Hi! I’m here! How’s things?” You gradually become immune to the noise and UK roads seem eerily quiet in contrast when you get back to the M4 or M25! Cows are sacred in this majority Hindu country and as such are allowed to roam the streets and busy motorways. This is surprising at first but again, very soon becomes your new normal. It is a punishable offence to hurt a cow, so expect swerving around them to avoid collisions. It is less than ideal to see them eating from plastic rubbish bags by the side of the road and this can result in some nasty complications to their health. Street dogs are everywhere and all tend to look similar – usually a benign shade of beige mongrel. They wander and sleep and are, generally, friendly and harmless.
Tuk-tuks (or auto rickshaws) jostle with the cars (mainly white in Metro cities to combat the intense summer heat), lorries, motorcycles, scooters, vans and cows for space on the roads and rules of the highway seem to not really apply in India. It is a case of everyone out for themselves and trying to avoid head-on collisions in the meantime. To be fair, Indians seem to be very skilled drivers and whilst your heart maybe in your mouth for many a journey, the best advice to cope with Indian driving is to put your seatbelt on and enjoy the show from the window! People selling anything and everything will weave in and out of the cars, as well as beggars knocking at the window, often carrying an adorable, dishevelled-looking baby and putting their hands to their mouths. It is heartbreaking and soul-destroying but you can’t possibly give to everyone.
For anyone who has experienced India, the words from the film ‘The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel’: ‘All of life is here…..’ rings so true. Life (and death) is everywhere and unavoidable. The colours are brighter, the smiles are wider and the harsh realities of life are starker and more in focus here. Rubbish piles up by the side of the road, yards from ancient Mughal forts and palaces which have been beautifully restored. 5* hotels jostle for position near to street stalls and markets, with people working hard to eek out a meagre living. Children from slums are beautifully turned out for school in pristine uniforms; the girls with immaculate plaits in their ebony, shiny hair. Women, on their haunches in the ‘Asian squat’ position, sell their wares in the baking sun, resplendent in the most vibrant saris. In the words of Kiran Millwood Hargrave : “India is a place where colour is doubly bright. Pinks that scald your eyes, blues you could drown in.”
If you are anything like me, India will work its magic on you and you feel some strange sort of calm amongst the chaos. India is home to over a billion people, yet there is peace to be found at every turn. Religion is the cornerstone and the moral compass for so many and temples, gurdwaras, mosques, churches and synagogues are everywhere. Hinduism especially pervades all aspects of Indian life and the love for the countless deities is evident in every home and every street corner. The smell of incense will forever remind you of this wonderful land.
You will hear numerous languages being spoken and in amongst these unfamiliar tongues you will hear a peppering of English words which will remind you of home (the amalgamation of Hindi and English is often known as ‘Hinglish’) British rule has left a huge hangover in modern India; the European buildings in Mumbai, Kolkata and Delhi left hand drive, the postal system, the railway network, English language and the abolition of practices such as child marriage. It also did so much harm – but that is for another blog…where do we start with Partition? You will see cricket being played in every street and in every park, as much a fabric of Indian life as saris and worship. The food will have familiar names, reminiscent of every British person’s Indian takeaway – as popular as fish and chips and roast dinners. Who could fail to know what naan bread, chapati, tikka, paneer and daal are?
And the best part of India for me? It’s not the incredible textile shops or the majestic stepwells and forts, it’s not the 5* hotels where you can collapse on to your deluxe king-size bed in air conditioned splendour, after a traditional welcome as you arrive, staff with hands in prayer position, wishing you ‘Namaste’ with the widest smiles, it’s not the incredible thali feasts you can have for a fraction of the cost at home. My ‘happy place’ is sitting by the side of the road on a makeshift stool or chair, sipping the most delicious, sweet, spiced chai from a traditional chai stall where they boil the milky concoction in vast stainless steel saucepans and offer it to you for mere pennies in a clay ‘kulhad’ cup, or sometimes a paper cup emblazoned with advertising. Amongst the mayhem and busyness, this is where I find peace, watching the real India go by, chatting to locals or bartering over fridge magnets with street children who have more responsibility in their short lives than most adults in the UK have in a lifetime.
Who would have thought that I could pinpoint the last time I felt absolute, unadulterated happiness? It was sitting with a group of street children by the Lake Palace in Jaipur. Once they had given up on selling me the same keyring over and over (I bought at least 5!) they chatted to me in amazing English, joking with each other and jostling to be ‘top dog’. One lovely girl told me: “I am Hindu and he is Muslim but we can still be friends! But I can’t be friends with him today because he has dirty teeth!” We can learn so much from children. We laughed and joked and they showed off their English to me and proudly told me they went to school “most of the time”.
Other favourite memories of India include having chai and pakoras at our first tour guide’s home. What an honour to be invited as a guest (and virtual stranger) to someone’s house and play with their child, the same age as the children I teach, yet thousands of miles apart. How proud I was that I recognised some of the Gods that were in their home temple, but how silly I feel now I know so much more about Hinduism…. (but you don’t know what you don’t know!) That tour guide is now our Head of India Operations (Vikash) at Chai Rose Travels. Chance meetings can change your life!
So, try India – it could well change your life too!
I will leave you with a quote to ponder on that is said far more eloquently that I can muster: “There are some parts of the world that, once visited, get into your heart and won’t go. For me, India is such a place. When I first visited, I was stunned by the richness of the land, by its lush beauty and exotic architecture, by its ability to overload the senses with the pure, concentrated intensity of its colors, smells, tastes, and sounds. It was as if all my life I had been seeing the world in black and white and, when brought face-to-face with India, experienced everything re-rendered in brilliant technicolor.” (Keith Bellow)
September 2025, London.